"Haha..oh man, little sis Dariya's gon get in so much trouble...she could prob handle it though. I don't think there's too much to be fraid of...we're all tough adventurers, right?
Raido says this just to lighten up the atmosphere, but the caution on his face says otherwise. He was never really good at that.
Oomlowt keeps his crossbow ready, to murder whatever might pop out of the trap cart.
He hoped it was a mite.
Thunderstone Toss:
Bandit1 Attack:
Bandit1 Damage:
Gird Will Save:
Bandit1 stealth check:
Bandit2 Stealth check:
Bandit3 Attack:
Bandit3 Damage:
Bandits: You don't see anything, but as Dariya approaches the cart, a small object sails through the air, and strikes the ground next to the cart, splintering the wood, and making a very large bang. The sound is so loud you can hear it clearly sixty feet down the path.
Dariya doesn't let is stop he though, and starts bringing Lockjaw around to the open end of the cart. However, as she nears it, an arrow sticks her in the shoulder, dealing 4 points of damage!
Then a man dressed in wood-stained leather armor comes up from behind a log and fires at Dariya! However, he misses and ducks back down behind the log.
Dariya and Lockjaw: Wow! That sure is... exciting! Finally, you have a chance to prove you're a true hero to all of those greenhorns back there.
You reach the cart and look inside. You can see some crates, no doubt full of gold, as well as bags of spare silver and gold pieces. Two ornate wooden boxes are also stacked in the cart, and one is finely polished.
Kressle: Who/what is Kressle, and why is he/she/it involved here?
Oomlowt: You see Dariya get pegged by the arrow, but do when you whip your crossbow up to counter attack!
But you're not quite sure where the shot came from, but you have a pretty good idea... you just need to look a little more closely before firing.
However, you can see the other bandit just fine, and fire at him. But he's too far away, and your shot goes wide. You'll have to move in a little closer to do any real damage to him.
Raido: It's a long walk to the cart, so instead of moving on up, you try to give some sage advice.
It didn't come out right.
Thrae: The little person is an idiot, the bird-man is an idiot, and you don't even know what that idiot of a Half-Orc is doing. What's so interesting about those bushes that she can't focus on the fight going on right in front of her?
Whatever, you've got your trident out, and you're pretty sure you can take whatever is thrown at you.
Gird: You were set to fight, but then you saw something out of the corner of your eye. It was blue, but ti went by too quickly for you to make out any details. Then there was a flash and you saw a flicker of something before it vanished.
Now the bushes are cooing at you, and you're pretty sure bushes shouldn't do that.
Oomlowt cautiously moves closer and fires his crossbow again!
"Stupid arrogant piss-drinking short wolf lady can't even wait to look for a trap..." Gird snarls as she draws her bow. Advancing farther than Oomlowt (), she knocks an arrow and fires at the bandit hiding by the logs.
Well, judging by how the cart looks, at least you'll have a pretty sweet reward waiting for you once you're done with these silly bandits.
Dariya shouts commands, and Lockjaw advances towards this Bandit Number Three who just missed firing at her.
"Whoa....like, dang man. Guess there ain't no avoidin it. Guess ol Raido's gonna havta step onto the field...I guess."
Raido moves forward enough to , read to provide some slashings and healings. Hiba greatly regrets getting up today.
Thrae's ears perk up and she notices it's battle time. "Finally, some actual fighting." she says to herself. She follows Oomlowt and the stands about 10 feet away from him.
She might like to fight, but she thinks that maybe she should wait, prepare herself, and not just go into this fight head-first.
Or maybe she's just a little lazy.
Bandit1 Attack:
Bandit1 Damage:
Bandit2 Attack:
Bandit2 Damage:
Bandit3 Attack:
Bandit3 Damage:
Bandits: Two more arrows slice through the air, landing at Lockjaw's feet, but failing to strike him or his rider. The bandit behind the log jumps from his cover again, sending an arrow into Dariya's other shoulder, dealing 5 points of damage! The arrow has wedged itself between two pieces of armor, which have forced it deeper than the other one.
Dariya and Lockjaw: You urge Lockjaw towards the bandit behind the log, your mighty steed covers the distance quickly, his teeth bared in a fierce snarl.
You're gonna bash in some heads, and it's gonna be awesome.
Kressle: Who?
Oomlowt: You slink up to the cart, but your shorter legs leaves you behind your larger companions. You'll show them, though. You'll show them that you're the best sniper this team has ever had!
And then they will respect you.
Raido: You shrug and shuffle up with the rest of the group, but slowly. The forest is lush, and you can't help but admire the unfettered nature around you. It's calming.
Hiba disagrees.
Thrae: You stalk forward, your teeth showing and your trident ready. If this gets ugly, you're going to show these losers just how dangerous a Gnoll can be.
You just hope you don't lose your cool and start laughing. That would be embarrassing.
Gird: Sexually frustrated bushes have to wait, because there is a midget whose in need of a beating. Preferably from you. After she kills all of those bandits [you're fairly sure they're bandits, I mean, they're like cookie-cutters of those dudes at Oleg's]. And you've taken all the loot in the cart.
Then you'll beat her.
You move up to the cart, ready to pull out your longbow and give Dariya some cover fire.
Gird continues to move up towards where the bandit is taking cover, snarling. She must be losing her godsd*mned mind! She must be! Bushes are cooing, one of her party members literally charged into a trap, and, with the exception of Oomlowt, the only sane one*, the others haven't even bothered to draw long-range weapons! Whatever, looks like it's up to her to save the day.
*And Oomlowt is a f*cking kobold, who'da thought that he would be the one she trusts her life with the most. Then again, her other choices are a bird, a b*tch, and an half-sized idiot. Days like this, Gird misses Pretty Boy and Goat Boy. And that other one. What had his name been?
Oomlowt sneaks up a little further, right next to Raido, in an attempt to see what is going on. Dariya is blocking the one bandit he can see from sight, which... isn't good. The fact that he and the rest of the party are exposed isn't very good either.
Then he remembers the gold cart. Maybe the trap they triggered was the only one - they could use it for cover! Oomlowt looks closely to see if the cart is safe.
Oomlowt reloads his crossbow and waits for the bandits to become a bit more exposed.
"Oh man...little sis Dariya's in a heap a trouble, guess it's up to old Raido to go an, patch her up, right? Yeah, don't worry sis, I'm a comin!"
Raido heads toward Dariya for some sword support and healing, and heads as close to her as the turn allows.
Hiba is much less stupid, and decides to occupy a tree for the round.
Thrae suppresses a laugh by snorting as she watches everyone around her scramble around. She doesn't necessarily feel like doing anything right now. Plus, its not like anyone is in grave danger.
She leans against her trident and simply looks around, that way she isn't doing absolutely nothing.
Bandit1 Attack:
Bandit1 Damage:
Bandit2 Attack:
Bandit2 Damage:
Bandit3 Attack:
Bandit3 Damage:
Dariya Attack:
Dariya Damage:
Lockjaw Attack:
Lockjaw Damage:
Bandits: More arrows sail through the air, but this time, one hits Gird dealing 3 points of damage!
Honestly it's mostly impressive that the bandit Dariya's got boxed in didn't hit her, but maybe he was just getting cocky.
We might not ever know.
And... are those more Bandits coming from the treeline?
Dariya and Lockjaw: Dariya on the other hand, ain't having none of that, and orders Lockjaw to attack. Her mighty wold descends on the poor bandit, and the crunch of bone is sickeningly audible. The poor man screams as Lockjaw drags him to the ground, shaking violently, until Dariya gently stops him.
Lockjaw drops the crying man at once, allowing Dariya to give him a nasty blow, knocking the poor guy blissfully unconscious.
Kressle: Gosh, what a mysterious mystery.
Oomlowt: You move cautiously towards the cart, carefully looking for any traps that might be a part of it's design.
And that's when you catch a glint of serrated steel through a hole in the wood. As you get even closer, you realize that there is a bear trap stealthily tucked underneath all the sweet loot.
But the cart itself looks safe enough to use as cover, so you do just that.
And you haven't been stabbed or set on fire yet, so that's a good sign.
Raido: No one here is getting any younger, but some of them are getting much deader, so you decide to go give Dariya some support.
You are a man of the wild, so you're sure that whatever these strangely aggressive men have in store won't be able to inconvenience you so much here.
Hiba has different ideas and gets the hells out of Absalom.
Thrae: You half-heartedly look around you, and oh my... it looks like someone is being naughty and hiding in one of the trees. He's about... 20 feet off of the ground, on a wooden platform hidden behind some leaves. He's currently got his bow out, trying for another shot.
Not exactly the stealthiest guy around.
Gird: You can't believe how incompetent these new adventures are. They're practically greenhorns! You haven't been a wandering paladin all that long, and you have years of experience over them! It really rustles your jimmies.
At least the creek manages to cool you down a bit, so that was nice.
Seeing Dariya and her pet wolf took down the bandit easily, Gird felt slightly guilty. Well, she can clearly take of her self, maybe I was wrong...? She's stills stupid as balls for rushing into a trap though! But at least that's one down, two ore more left to go. Pulling the arrow from her shoulder in a bad*ss display of pain tolerance, Gird scans the area, trying to notice any of the archers that had been shooting at her and her party members.
Oomlowt looked around. The one bandit he could see was blocked by his team mates, making it rather difficult to hit him accurately. The kobold decided to cautiously move around to a different side of the cart and wait for a clearer shot.
Thrae looked to the others with bows. She didn't have one herself because she can't f*cking aim with one to save her life.
But anyways, she shouts out and points in the general direction of where she saw the guy "Hey, there's a guy in a tree over there. You guys should kill him, y'know, that would be really helpful."
She doesn't think anyone heard her. Thrae let's out a sigh and just stands around some more.
Raido hurries along to Dariya, standing next to her. He starts chanting one of his spells to help fix her up.
"Don't worry now Dariya sis! Ol Raido's gonna patch ya up nice and good! Washoi!"
Putting his hands to her, he starts using that dang ol magic of his.
Bandit1 Attack:
Bandit1 Damage:
Bandit2 Attack:
Bandit2 Damage:
Dariya Attack:
Dariya Damage:
Lockjaw Attack:
Lockjaw Damage:
Bandit3 Stabilization Check:
Bandits: Those are definitely bandits spilling out of the treeline - like daisies! They mostly sneer or snarl, but a few snag some cover behind the trees and ready their bows.
However, one bandit lets out a pained cry and leaps over the log, sword drawn, ready to defend the crumpled and bleeding body Lockjaw left there. They were probably brothers or something.
A couple more arrows come out of nowhere, one striking the cart near Oomlowt and the other hitting the ground at Gird's feet.
Dariya and Lockjaw: More meat for the mangler! Wait no, that's a terrible title. Dariya the mangler, nobody would think you're a hero if you're "the mangler". You'll have to give this more thought later.
Right now, you've got a foolish man who's crying for no good reason just begging to be pegged in the face with your flail, and you see no reason to deny him that.
So your flail clocks him on the head, knocking out a few teeth, and causing the poor man to stumble a little, saving him from Lockjaw's gnashing teeth.
Kressle: After the flow of bandits has ebbed, another, a woman dressed in yellowed armor casually walks out of the treeline, calmly flipping and catching an axe as she does so. She then smirks and leans on a log, putting the axe on her belt, and pulling out one of four wicked looking daggers.
Oomlowt: You scuttle around the cart, looking for a better terget, as well as better cover from that arrow. You scan the treeline, and see that there is a man trying very hard to hide himself in the leaves of one of the trees, fumbling with his bow and an arrow all the while.
Naughty, naughty.
Raido: You hop over the rest of the creek and shuffle towards Dariya, who is smiling dangerously. She must be really heroic.
So she can continue being really heroic, you whip out your magic hands and call on the power of nature to condense into a simple healing spell. It's tough work, getting something as big and beautiful and terrible as nature to cooperate, but you're a druid, you're used to stuff like that.
Tapping Dariya so that the spell can do its thing is another matter entirely, and you have trouble getting her while her mount and her fidget around.
Thrae: You very kindly and very casually say that inform the group that there is a tricky man hiding in the trees, but it seems like nobody hears you.
Fine, whatever, you didn't like these guys anyway.
Gird: You watch the one bandit collapse, and are a little annoyed that the little idiot can rush into a trap and still manage to come out on top.
You're still going to yell at her later, maybe.
Right now you've got to focus on keeping yourself alive, so you pull the arrow out of your shoulder, and look for the bandit Thrae was talking about. Oh, there he is, hiding on that little wooden platform.
What a baby.
Oomlowt fires his crossbow upon bandit number 7!
While something about the woman with the creepy weird armor (How did she get it yellow?! Creeeeepy!) is unsettling to GIrd, she figures that the stupid bandits in the trees pose a more immediate threat. Plus, maybe the lady is on her side? It's doubtful, but something is making Gird not want to fight her. As she readies her shot, Gird takes a look over her shoulder to make sure Oomlowt is okay. She's worked pretty hard at keeping him alive, and she'd hate to lose him now. Seeing that he's fine, Gird fires at the bandit who shot at her. "An eye for an eye, motherf*cker?"
Thrae locks her eyes onto Kressle. That human has got no business looking so calm and bad*ss.
She clenches her trident and steps up to the cart, Thrae doesn't want to just charge at the lady alone. That would be really stupid.
Images of Dariya being an idiot pop into her mind.
Having finished up with Dariya, Raido then turns his attention to Gird and also noticing the arrival of more bandits. Quickly huddling behind Gird, he begins another spell.
"Ah, there ya go sis. Should be healthier now. But you best be careful, those arrows look sharp. You don't want yer eyes poked out now, right?"
Hiba continues to watch disapprovingly for the treetops.
Bandit1 Attack:
Bandit1 Damage:
Bandit2 Attack:
Bandit2 Damage:
Bandit4 Attack:
Bandit4 Damage:
Bandit5 Attack:
Bandit5 Damage:
Bandit6 Attack:
Bandit6 Damage:
Bandit7 Attack:
Bandit7 Damage:
Kressle Attack:
Kressle Damage:
Dariya attack:
Dariya Damage:
Lockjaw Attack:
Lockjaw damage:
Mounted Combat:
Bandits: The bandits use their cover to unleash a volley of arrows on all of you, dealing 7 points of damage to Dariya, 6 points of damage Raido, and 4 points of damage to Oomlowt! A chorus of jeers can be heard after each hit, and the bandits who miss are often yelled at, but in a friendly way, you guess?
Which doesn't bode entirely well for you.
The angrysad bandit swipes at Lockjaw with his shortsword, but Dariya manages to guide her steed out of harms way, pulling her arm back for another swing...
Dariya and Lockjaw: Which bludgeons the poor man in the face again, sending him crumpling to the ground! You congratulate yourself and pat Lockjaw on the head when he stops mid lunge.
You're going to beat all of these losers down.
Kressle: This strange woman and her commanding presence both smile smugly and she casually chucks a knife at gird, not even paying attention to whether or not it hits [it doesn't], simply laughing at the men around her and going for another knife.
Oomlowt: Ouch! That really stings! You have no idea where that arrow came from, but a new bandit has shown up, and you're itching to unload some crossbow bolts into his soft, pink ape-flesh [seriously why can't these humans have scales like normal creatures?]!
Unfortunately, the tree in front of him takes the blow. Cover is the worst when it isn't yours.
Raido: Holy g-o-double d that smarts! You'll have to deal with that later, now is the time for buffing teammates!
You amble over to Gird, because Dariya can obviously take care of herself, even if she gave you a hasty thank you.
You repeat your magic hands on Gird, who gives you a smart comment of how it was just arrows, nothing serious. She's such a jokester, for sharks.
What a card, that Gird.
Thrae: The new chick with the axes looks like bad news. In fact, she looks a little too much like competition for number one bad*ss around here, and you aren't about to give that title up.
So you move forward, next to the cart, and pull out your trident to show you mean business.
You snarl for good measure.
Gird: Wow, you feel good as new, thanks to that bird-man. Good as new and ready to bring the hurt on silly bandit snipers. You try for an awesome one-liner to prove you mean business, but unfortunately, your shot is lost in the canopy.
Cover sucks.
"Mother pussbucket!" Oomlowt snarled. "That hurts!"
Oomlowt fires another arrow before slinking back down behind the cart for cover.
Having missed the guy in the trees, Gird turns her attention to the creepy lady chucking daggers around. While she'd rather not have to fight her, daggers are serious business! Gird draws back her bow, and fires!
Thrae's ears perk up from the sound of Oomlowt "cursing" (seriously, why can't he swear like a real warrior).
Thrae takes one last look at the human-lady and goes around the cart to crouch down behind Oomlowt, because damn, he's small.
"Dont f*cking move, I'm here to heal you." she says as she tears out the arrows and places her hands on the wounds.
She would rather be scaring off some bandits ...and that yellow-armored lady, but this is more important.
Your magic fingers have saved the day, Thrae. Good job.
Raido is pegged with the arrow, gripping it tightly and yanking it out.
"Oh dang...that hurt...Ah man, all this bleeding and stuff's givin me a headache. Ah, better clean it all up!"
Raido starts readying his spell again, ready to heal up.
The procedure was a complete success, Washoi!
Ah, yes, two men down, single-handedly by you and your wolf! Doesn't that make you feel like a powerful hero, huh?
Yeah it does.
Dariya looks around, ready to choose her next target. This... Axed lady with some yellow fashion statement kinda feels like a leader. Maybe if you took her down the rest of these silly archers would get all demoralised..? Though Dariya doesn't really care about small things like arrows stucking out of her shoulders, they sure are a huge inconvenience.
Maybe you could try making at least a few of these bandits... More scared of you.
Dariya waves her mighty (small) flail in the air with grand motions, accompanied by a scary heroic speech.
"You see that? You see that bandits?! You better brace yourselves! I've already smacked some sense into two of you with this flail right here, and they seem to enjoy their blissfull sleep!"
Well, Dariya was always better at telling stories than being scary... But it's worth a shot, right?
Bandit1 Attack:
Bandit1 Damage:
Bandit2 Attack:
Bandit2 Damage:
Bandit4 Attack:
Bandit4 Damage:
Bandit5 Attack:
Bandit5 Damage:
Bandit7 Attack:
Bandit7 Damage:
Kressle Attack:
Kressle Damage:
Bandit6 Stabilization Check:
Bandits: The bandits all look at the second fallen bandit and back at Dariya, before exchanging looks among themselves. They nod and focus their fire on Dariya. They all miss except for one, who scores a killer joint shot, dealing 6 points of damage!
Dariya and Lockjaw: Hmmph, you'll show them to fear you. You raise your flail in the air and start twirling it while shouting at the bandits. However, it's hard to keep the momentum going on the flail and it flails around rather than spins.
And your Halfing shouts are not quite as intimidating as you'd like.
Lockjaw looks pretty intimidating, though. That has to count for something, right?
Kressle: The woman, casually flicks another dagger in a general-Gird direction, this one barely missing Gird's hair as it sails past and into the creek. This time however, the lady quietly curses before quickly pulling out yet another knife.
Oomlowt: Wowch, you were not expecting that! After snarling some choice words, you quickly fire your crossbow at the bandit across the way, managing to spit the poor soul's leg!
Raido: Not paying attention to the battle going on around you, you rip the arrow out and use your healing magic on yourself.
It sure is lucky that literally all of the spells you prepared this morning were healing spells.
Thrae: Wow, that tiny lizard can't use any real curses? That's awful. You'd at least expect, like, a Mothermonster out of him, or possibly a Cacklebrain, but none of this "mother pussbucket" nonsense.
Whatever, you decide you'd better go heal him, he looks small and squishy.
So calling on the power of your god, you kneel beside Oomlowt and let the rage of the drowned rat bubble up and through your body, spilling out of your hand and into Oomlowt's wound.
It feels like white-water rafting.
Gird: Creepy lady has chucked two knives at you, and that last one was too close for comfort. It's time to bring it to this smug piece of sh*t.
So you bring up your bow and fire, only for the woman to casually duck.
That could have gone better.
Gird hisses at the knife lady, and fires again. Maybe she'll actually hit something, this time?
"Oh, thank you!" Oomlowt said as the terrifying gnoll healed his wounds. "I needed that!" He then promptly fired his crossbow before ducking back down behind the cart.
"Yeah, no problem." Thrae half-heartily says. She's busy staring down the flashy human lady, trying to see if she can find anything special about her.
Uggh, all these arrows sticking out of the small cracks in Dariya's armor don't feel so hot.
Dariya looks around, wondering where the heck that little lizard guy and that gnoll lady went, since they're nowhere to be seen.
Dariya hates backing out from a battle, but she doesn't really enjoy being the target of all the arrows either, no matter how heroic it made her feel. She'd like to go and club those cowardly bandits with her flail, but these stupid logs were on the way..! She'd have to go all the way around the logs to get to the bandits - but apparently the yellow lady was throwing daggers at anyone on the other side of the logs.
Eh, daggers sounded a bit better than arrows.
Dariya commands Lockjaw to move, hoping the bandits would take a minute to adjust to her changed location.
Oh jeez, if the tough ones go down, everyones gonna blame it on the guy who didn't heal them. Raido can't live with uselessness on his conscious! Guess he needs to stay close to those two battle girls.
...If only one of them didn't move around so much though...Guess you got no choice but to move on up.
"Hang on now everybody! Please don't die now, right?"
Raido does his best to stay between Gird and Dariya.
Bandit1 Attack:
Bandit1 Damage:
Bandit2 Attack:
Bandit2 Damage:
Bandit4 Attack:
Bandit4 Damage:
Bandit5 Attack:
Bandit5 Damage:
Bandit7 Attack:
Bandit7 Damage:
Kressle Attack:
Kressle Damage:
Kressle Crit Confirm:
Bandits: The bandits continue to focus fire on Dariya, but only the bandit directly across from her manages to strike a hit, which would be relatively minor if Dariya wasn't already a living pin-cushion, she takes 4 points of damage!
Dariya and Lockjaw: You decide all of this being-shot-at business isn't nearly as fun and heroic as you thought. You decide that you'd rather get in close with the dagger-lady, who is pretty clearly the authority figure, here.
So, you move Lockjaw in that direction, and ready your flail. This bandit's goin' doooown.
Kressle: Kressle looks Dariya up and down before smirking, She then whips around lightning fast, chucking her dagger with the same sort of disinterested precision as before.
Except this time, Gird gets a dagger in her throat. It seems to have missed the really important things, maybe, but there is a lot of blood. Really, there is blood sort of gurgling from Gird's mouth and out of the dagger. No matter how it heals, that's probably going to leave a scar.
Kressle just smiles wider as her hands go for the hatchets at her belt.
Oomlowt: You thank Thrae for her healing, which was refreshing. Sort of like having someone dunk cold water on you to clear your head Although, in this case, you have the sneaking suspicion that it is more like your head was dunked into the water.
You quickly decide to ignore that, and focus on the combat, There will be plenty of time to ponder the theological symbolism inherent in your companion's magic.
So you dart out from behind your cart to fire on the bandit, but as you're aiming you notice Gird's bloody face! Not her, too!
You miss.
Raido: That... was not good! You squawk words of encouragement as you hobble over to place yourself between the meatshields. You wish you hadn't used your last cure spell on yourself, but, these things happen, so might as well give some of that life back through combat!
Thrae: You brush off Oomlowt's thanks, and work on assessing the situation. It's much easier to direct others in combat, rather than actively participate. You're rarely in the same kind of danger.
So you peek over the cart and check out Kressle. She smells like a human, but you're pretty sure the rest of them could figure that out. Other than that, it looks like she has run out of daggers. And judging by the state of Gird's face, she seems to have something against orcs, not that you blame her. Orcs are too loud, smelly, and violent for any self-respecting Gnoll.
You have not learned as much as you had hoped.
Gird: Holy **** that ****ing smarts like a ****ing **** ***** ****! You try to hiss at the godsdamned knife lady, but it comes out as an aggressive gurgle. Even though the pain is almost unbearable, you leave the dagger in your throat. For all you know, it could the the only thing holding you together right now.
Instead you desperately fire off an arrow, while starting to shuffle away from the nasty-lady and towards a place you can ask for Erastil's divine health.
You turn your head away, even as your arrow pierces Kressle's upper bicep.
Ow. Ow. Ow! Ow!ow!Owowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowowow Gird can't think straight, and she fumbles uselessly at the dagger in her throat. Should she pull it out? Should she heal around the dagger? Gird can feel the blood pounding in her head, and also the blood coursing down her armor. Staggering back, Gird drops her bow and shakily presses her hand to her throat, fitting it around the dagger and healing. Looking around, her face finds Oomlowt, and she can see her shock echoed there. She can also see Thrae, who also looks surprised, and also somewhat impressed. Trying to smile, Gird mages to force out some encouragement, though it's unlikely that anyone can hear her.
"Just a flesh wound."
Thrae sits behind Oomlowt. She really didn't learn anything from that human, aside from a hate for orcs. But everyone hates orcs, so thats nothing new.
Though, Gird is near death (f*cking impressive that shes alive, actually), and it looks like the halfling thing is also going to die soon...
...Maybe she should help them.
She gets up and yells at Gird, "Hey, Gird! Stop being a f*cking walking target!!". There, now she has an excuse to help her teammates without it seeming like shes doing it from the goodness of her heart.
She grips her trident and sprints as close to Dariya as she possibly can.
Dariya looks back at Gird, throat and mouth gushing blood all over, and lets out a symphatethic hiss. That HAS to hurt.
Dariya's not feeling so good herself either, but she can't just turn back now, not now when she's so close to the yellow lady..! The rest of the bandits just MIGHT get demoralized if they see their leader fall.
"Aaaaaaaaa..!"
Dariya steers Lockjaw at Kressle, flailing her flail, and commanding the wolf to attack as well.
"Please don't let anyone die!" Oomlowt whined to whatever gods might be listening. "Except those people we're fighting. Please let all of them die without any causalities from the people I don't find objectionable!"
His... prayer? ... made, Oomlowt aimed for the big meanie who hit Gird.
Oh..Oh no..this is not good. Not good. This is very very NOT GOOD. Jeez oh crap, get close you fool. Get close man..get close...don't let them die. Just...she has too much to live for..you don't...
"I won't...let ya'll die! Doncha die on me now!!"
Raido quickly rushes at the nearest bandit. There's no where near enough time to properly attack them so...oh this isn't gonna taste good...
Bandit1 Attack:
Bandit1 Damage:
Bandit2 Attack:
Bandit2 Damage:
Bandit4 Attack:
Bandit4 Damage:
Bandit5 Attack:
Bandit5 Damage:
Bandit7 Attack:
Bandit7 Damage:
Kressle Attack1:
Kressle Attack2:
Kressle Damage1:
Kressle Damage2:
Kressle Crit Confirm:
Dariya AoO:
Lockjaw AoO:
Bandits: The bandits all let loose another volley of arrows, but fortunately they all miss their mark.
Dariya and Lockjaw: You see Gird's injury and feel a pang of sympathy pain before charging the lady with the axes. You figure that if you can take her out the rest of the bandits may stop attacking long enough to subdue more easily. You close the distance and peg her squarely in the side with your flail! The woman grunts, and you can see red begin to faintly stain her armor. Lockjaw also lunges at her, but he doesn't find a good purchase on her thigh armor, and his teeth slide ineffectually off.
The woman smiles and readies her gleaming axes...
Kressle: Before feinting past Dariya and her mighty wolf, deftly dodging past surprised swipes. She then closes the distance between her and the stuttering Gird, who is beginning to raise a hand to her throat, bubbling something about fleshwounds. The woman's eyes dart towards Raido, who seems ready to fight back. She quickly adjusts her axes and descends on the two adventurers. Her first axes comes at Gird perpendicular to her spine, while the second axe mirrors the motion. It nicks Raido, giving him a deep cut on his right arm dealing 3 points of damage.
...However, the first axe rips across Gird's back, causing blood to spill all over the bandit in a warm spray, dealing 8 points of damage!. Gird stumbles and falls to the ground, panting heavily as blood continues to flow from her neck and mouth. The bandit lets out a small, "Yes!" Her voice is deep for a woman, and very quiet, but it commands absolute attention.
She then turns towards Raido, and raises both axes, sticky with blood, and smiles, her voice is barely above a whisper, but it seems like she is yelling, "You're next, beakhead."
Oomlowt: You watch in a sort of helpless shock as Gird falls to the ground, and you begin to plead to any god that will listen. It's pretty pathetic, but you're a Kobold, and Kobold's are not known for their composure.
Your whining done, you level your Crossbow, and fire it directly at the awful woman who felled Gird. The bolt strikes the woman in the collar, and you can here her stifled scream of pain. She almost looks worried now.
Good, only you know the hells you will put her through.
Raido: You squawk in surprise and grief before doing the only thing you can think of.
You charge the awful bandit with your "beakhead."
Unfortunately, she manages to easily dodge, despite her pretty awful wounds.
Thrae: Well, things have gone to hells without you, it's time to intervene. At least the Orc seems to be breathing. You wouldn't want to eat that.
This woman with the axes, though, she will be much more filling.
You lick your muzzle in anticipation and brandish your Trident as you stalk towards her.
You've even brought a fork...
Gird: Erastil, that ****ing hurts like a mother****ing ***** **** ****rag. What the hells is that woman's problem? At least she had the decency to bring your hands closer to your neck. Your thoughts begin to slip, but a final rush of adrenaline rushes from somewhere deep in the back of your head. You grip the dagger in one hand and rip it from your throat, gurgling and wheezing as your lungs stop functioning properly. You shakily grasp your neck with your free hand and let Erastil's power flow through it, rejoicing as you begin to breathe again.
Void begins to take you as you begin to slump over. You think you mumble something about fleshwounds just before the stream completely vanishes, and in its place there are only dreams.
Wow, prayer worked! Maybe these gods weren't as apathetic and worthless as Oomlowt had come to assume. Perhaps he should give a bit more credit to Calistria...
The kobold looked at his quiver. He hadn't tried those red arrows yet, and things looked dire. Maybe he should give it a shot. Ooo, see what he did there? Oomlowt loaded a shiny red bolt and aimed at Kressle again. Ooo, she was gonna pay!
Alternatively, should she be dead by now (fingers crossed!), Oomlowt aimed at bandit 7 instead.
May need to be modified once we discover what the red arrows do.
Oh damn.
The orc lady's fallen.
Let's hope she's not dead, because she seemed very tough, at least from what Dariya gathered from the short time she's hanged out with this crowd.
But whether she's dead or not can be checked later. There's still combat to do.
Determined to take this leader lady down, Dariya pulls Lockjaw's scruffy neck hair, steering the wolf at Kressle's direction, and readies another attack.
Gird's almost dead, Jim. Take her treasure.
Well the gross bloody thing is down. Thrae goes up to Gird. Man, the blood smells terrible. Should she eat her or-
Oh, Gird's still breathing. Well thats good, it's not like Thrae was going to eat her anyway.
It's best to try healing her before she dies, since Gird does most of the work on the team which lets Thrae slack off. Though, Gird should work on her ability to not be a walking target, for f*cks sake.
BEAKHEAD LIVES ANOTHER DAY!! But now is the time for VENGEANCE!...Yeah...how about that bite thing again...might work a bit better...get away from the corpse of crazy ladies, right?
Raido quickly runs to the nearest bandit once more to attempt a crunchy crunch.
Bandit1 Attack:
Bandit1 Damage: [X3 = 15]
Bandit2 Attack:
Bandit2 Damage:
Bandit4 Attack:
Bandit4 Damage:
Bandit5 Attack:
Bandit5 Damage:
Bandit7 Attack:
Bandit7 Damage:
Kressle Stabilize Roll:
Oomlowt Crossbow Bonus:
Bandit1 Crit Confirm Roll [manual]: 14
Bandits: The bandits look a little nervous. Some of them exchange worried glances, and their scruffy lips seem to almost quiver. Regardless, during the usual barrage of arrows, one of the bandits manages to snipe Raido, burying a wicked arrow in the poor Tengu's chest. He falls to the ground with a feeble caw, his breathing ragged.
Raido is at negative one hit points!
Dariya and Lockjaw: Oh no she didn't. That lady looked like she knew her way around a battlefield, and you could use some extra muscle around here! You push Lockjaw in the direction of the axe-lady and lift your flail. Your wolf closes in quickly, and you peg the woman in the side of the head, mangling her ear and jaw. At the same time, Lockjaw captures her stumbling legs in his jaws and twists violently, sending her slamming into the rocky bank.
She's not going to be so smug if she wakes up.
Kressle: Kressle is preoccupied bleeding out into the brook. She also failed to stabilize, and loses another hitpoint.
Oomlowt: Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes! The gods answered your prayer [you have decided it was definitely a prayer]! Maybe that whole Calistria thing Woden talked about wasn't that bad.
Thus bolstered, you gleefully load a red bolt into your crossbow and pop a bolt into the bandit across the way.
The bolt sails for the bandit's shoulder, but it doesn't so much bury itself in his flesh as it burns its way in, exploding into a bright inferno.
The flash was momentarily dazzling, but as your eyes recover, you can see the bandit belly-up under the tree, flames still licking his armor and the tree's trunk.
Those are some good crossbow bolts.
Raido:
You are not dying.
Thrae: You grumble to yourself about how Gird should at least have the courtesy to die if she's going to go down. Or, even better, be a better tank so that you don't have to do any work.
Regardless you let the power of Hanspur flow out of your hand and into Gird, healing the Half-Orc's wounds with the familiar smell of river bottom and blood.
Gird:
Your head is pounding and your throat hurts, but you open your eyes anyway. You are in a patch of brambles, and at first you don't want to get up. But, as you sit there, you can feel a faint pull to the west. You carefully get up, not noticing that your armor shines like new.
After slipping through the brambles less than gracefully, you stumble into an awe-some clearing. It is dominated by a loomin, upthrust ridge of rock topped with moss. The side facing you has been carved into the likeness of an immense elk, with antlers drooping down from its weathered face to frame a gargantuan cave. Steps lead up to this same cave from a 50-foot pool caked with algae. Both the steps and elk look quite old, and are generously coated with moss. The clearing itself is framed by many crumbling stone pillars [you can see at least ten, in various states of decay].
****, you really hope this isn't what awaits the faithful of Erastil in the afterlife. You can feel the connection this place has to your god deep in your gut.
Despite your aversion, you casually shuffle around the clearing, ending up at the edge of the pool. You decide you've been doing too much walking lately, and sit on the pool's rim. You absentmindedly dip your finger in to swirl the algae around, but as soon as your finger hits the water, your surroundings change.
The water is pristine and the stone appears freshly cut. There is not forest detritus spilling into the clearing, and the pillars are whole, supporting a beautifully carved wooden roof. You can see various harvest supplies piled in corners, some being carted by priests. It is but a glimpse, though, as the illusion is shattered by a pained roar from the cave. A huge, crazed looking bear rumbles out of the cave and locks eyes with you.
You attempt to flee, like an sensible person, but find yourself unable to. The bear rushes you, flecks of foam coming from its still roaring mouth. As it barrels into you, you can suddenly smell blood and... mud? The throbbing in your head subsides, and your throat doesn't hurt as much and suddenly the bear is gone and all you can see is Thrae's hyena face.
You have had more restful naps.
Gird startles up, whipping her head back and forth. It's lucky that Thrae has already moved on to go do other things, because otherwise their heads would have connected, and Gird's fist would have definitely met Thrae's face. Noticing Kressle's prone body, Gird slumps slightly. Well that's good. Gird struggles to her feet, looking around. She approaches Kressle's body, interested to see if the motherf*cker is still breathing. As she walks over, Gird slips her hand beneath her armor, touching her bleeding back.
Ugh, that feels weird. Backs are not supposed to scab over that quickly. And what the f*ck was that? Was that...heaven? Are there even bears in heaven? F*ckkkkkkk.
"Holy hells!" Oomlowt stared at the burnt bandit in wide eyed shock. "I CAN RAIN BURNING DEATH! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Oomlowt ran up closer , loaded his crossbow with a normal bolt (have to save those red arrows for special murders), and aimed for one of the bandits in the bushes.