GM Aeon's We Be Goblins (Inactive)

Game Master d'Eon

They are goblins after all

Reflex 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (12) + 3 = 15

Vorka ducks behind the mast and avoids some of Mogmurch's awful breath, while Reta slices the dog really well! Lord Longtongue and Scabtongue both dodge most of Poog's spell.

Vorka's dog and toad double-team Reta, but only manage to scratch her. Vorka cackles and lights the Desnan candle she's holding and it begins to shoot balls of fire as she tries to aim it at Poog.

Vorka's Reflex Save, DC 13: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (13) + 5 = 18
Lord Longtongue's Reflex Save, DC 13: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (14) + 5 = 19
Scabtongue's Reflex Save, DC 13: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (17) + 3 = 20

Scabtongue's Bite: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (16) + 2 = 18
Damage: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2

Lord Longtongue's Bite: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (5) + 5 = 10

Vorka's Candle: 1d20 + 4 - 8 ⇒ (15) + 4 - 8 = 11

Bold may post
Chuffy
Mogmurch
Reta (3 damage)
Poog
Lord Longtongue
Vorka (9 damage)
Scabtongue (5 damage)

"Stop hiding, I cook you good, maybe you right and gobbo taste good!"

Mogmurch aching from heartburn decides to let out on final belch at Vorka

4d6 ⇒ (6, 5, 4, 5) = 20

Using ladder to go up: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (14) + 3 = 17

Chuffy scuttles up the ladder, and from the top cuts at Scabtongue. His footing isn't secure, though, and he misses badly.

Flanking dog slice: 1d20 + 5 + 2 ⇒ (2) + 5 + 2 = 9

Stupid animals bite and scratch at Reta! Now you find out why she called Big bad

Angrily she attacks the dog again with her dog slicer
Now me slice you up doggy she says with a laugh.
1d20 + 2 + 3 + 2 ⇒ (1) + 2 + 3 + 2 = 8 LOL Missing

Mogmurch snorts, "Big Bad at hitting doggers you mean, hahaha. How you miss a dog that big? I hope he eat you, then I eat him. I tell chief you no good with shiny weapon, maybe be better to trim nails with "

Fire Bolt + Divine Favour - into melee with cover: 1d20 - 4 ⇒ (11) - 4 = 7

Poog tries to send a fiery attack at the frog, but Reta's attack goes wide and hits Poog's hand and makes his flame flying into the sky.

"Stupid Reta makes Poog not hit! And she also fat! Move away and let Poog do the killing!"

Can you step aside next turn, to let Poog attack too?

If she moves though doesn't the dog get an AoO on her? There doesn't seem to be much room for her to maneuver until we get rid of one of the animals

Depends on how high the bridge we're standing on is. If it isn't high, you might be able to 5ft step off of it.

How much more of this adventure do we have? Im having fun with this big bad!

I'm guessing not too much, because we're already at the wreck and fighting Vorka, but there's We Be Goblins Too, We Be Goblins Free and We B4 Goblins if you want more scenarios with these four goofballs. Also, this is an evergreen.

Nice!

Is the plan to do the rest of these? This is the only one which is Evergreen correct?

As far as I know, We B4 Goblins is evergreen too.

I hope everything is okay with the DM

Vorka fails to avoid Mogmurch's fiery belch, and gets scorched real good! As Reta distracts the dog, Chuffy sneaks up behind it and eviscerates the horrible beast!

Vorka then does a little chant and waves her hands around as they begin to glow. Lord Longtongue continues snapping at Reta,

Vorka's Reflex Save, DC 13: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (5) + 5 = 10

Lord Longtongue's Bite: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (18) + 5 = 23
Damage: 1d6 + 4 ⇒ (1) + 4 = 5

Bold may post
Chuffy
Mogmurch
Reta (8 damage)
Poog
Lord Longtongue
Vorka (25 damage)

Sorry, got real busy at work leading up to the holiday. Then the website ate my post :(

Spellcraft DC 16: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (17) + 3 = 20

"Oh no! Vorka cast Make a Little More Healthy! Reta kill her!"

Thinking how he can help, Poog scratches his butt. He then realises he was hiding something behind his cloak all along, and pulls out a large colourful wooden tube. With a screamed prayer to Zarongel, Poog lights the Skyrocket and points it at Vorka.

"Hahahaha, a toasty Vorka is the best Vorka. Time to skewer dinner!"

Mogmurch shoots Vorka with shiny crossbow

Crossbow: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (19) + 6 = 251d6 ⇒ 3

Crit confim: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (14) + 6 = 201d6 ⇒ 2

He then reloads the crossbow.

She will continue with the attack on frogy=gy
1d20 + 4 ⇒ (4) + 4 = 8
missing

With the dog down, Chuffy elects to cut at the toad so Reta can get to Vorka faster. "When Chuffy done with you, we call you Lord No-Tongue!"

Dogslicer to Lord Longtongue: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (17) + 5 = 22
Dogslicer damage: 1d4 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2

Mogmurch's crossbow strikes Vorka right in the hand, and she slips from the rigging and thumps onto the deck. Lord Longtongue lets out a plaintive croak as his master falls, and begins hopping away into the swamp.

Vorka's Falling Damage: 1d6 ⇒ 5

Bold may post
Chuffy
Mogmurch
Reta (8 damage)
Poog
Lord Longtongue (2 damage)
Vorka (35 damage)

Poog, though Vorka went down, you can still fire the rocket at her, or you can aim at Lord Longtongue instead.

The gobliness will attack the groggy 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (3) + 4 = 7

"Heh heh... meanie Vorka go boom!"

Poog adjusts his aim just over Reta's shoulder and the firework takes off, hitting Vorka and blowing up in a blinding flash and a lovely bang. Poog grabs the toad on his head, making sure Dogfinder doesn't fall off because of the shock wave.

Damage: 2d6 ⇒ (6, 5) = 11

Vorka, Chuffy and Reta need to make DC 15 reflex saves for half. They also need to roll 50% blindness and deafness.

Mogmurch, remembering the dumb toad dodge his fire belch, takes aim with his last bomb of the day.

ranged touch: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (11) + 6 = 171d6 + 2 ⇒ (3) + 2 = 5

Reflex 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (18) + 3 = 21

Poog, I think Vorka was unconscious and dying before you shot her. Also, a skyrocket takes 1d6 rounds to explode after it's launched.

Reflex save: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (12) + 6 = 18

I doubt that the foe being unconscious would stop a goblin from attacking them. Also skyrockets explode immediately upon striking something.

It's just weird that there's no attack roll involved, especially since he's essentially firing into cover.

I know using the firework on Longtongue would have been much smarter, because it would both damage him and not damage us, but Poog wanted to blow Vorka up and Poog will blow Vorka up. He's a goblin, tactics aren't very important to him. For the attack roll, the firework description said it flies in a straight line, so I assumed it's more accurate than trying to fire a Desnan candle.

Did we win?

Blinded-1, deafened-2: 1d2 ⇒ 2

Chuffy manages to cover his eyes before the blast, but at the expense of his large and pustule-covered ears.

Blind 1d100 ⇒ 57
Deaf 1d100 ⇒ 75
High bad effect

Really? You couldn't do anything else? Damage is one thing but doing things that might screw over party members is a bit different

I originally intended to shoot at Vorka while she was in the Crow's Nest, which wouldn't have hurt any of you. However, she fell down, and I felt like the Poogiest thing to do would be fire at her anyway. This is We Be Goblins, and one of the points of the module is to do things you never would with a normal character. If you still feel this might be crossing the "don't be a douche" line, I will ask GM to redirect the attack to Longtounge.

I think I can settle this without any hard feelings. Being unconcious, Vorka simply lies there as the firework explodes. Chuffy and Reta both yelp and glare at Poog once their ears stop ringing and eyes stop flashing. Mogmurch toasts the frog as it flees into the woods. The awful barking continues from the rear of the ship.

Vorka is now dead, and has 3 potions of cure light wounds on her. Killing the cannibal is noteworthy, but your ultimate goal still awaits. Find out where the fireworks are!

"Poog sorry for callat-- collaba-- callo-- you take damage for greater good. Now Poog find more fireworks and burn more things that are not Reta and Chuffy."

Crossbow at the ready, Mogmurch tries to find where the fireworks may be, wary of the barking.

Glaring at the priest, Chuffy snatches one of the potions and gulps it down noisily. "Next time Poog light firework, Chuffy and Reta take it and put it <CENSORED>."

CLW potion: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 1 = 4

Or maybe not wait for fireworks, but use dog chopper instead she adds to the Chuffy's comments.

Ignoring Chuffy and Reta's comments, Poog waddles further onto the wrecked ship.

LOL, waddles

The main deck of the shipwreck is cluttered with objects both natural and artificial. Thick swaths of leafy vines grow over the deck, and shiny green patches of algae and moss grow where the vines do not. The central cabin's roof has a wide edge, creating a canopied walkway along the ship's sides. A flight of steps up to the roof of the ship's main cabin, the entrance to which is blocked by a door decorated by a large number of rodent and bird skulls. A smoking stovepipe chimney extends up from the ship's highest point above.

Poog, as you come around the corner, you spot what's been barking. Another of Vorka's dogs is chained to the aft mast, and is tugging at the limit of the chain.

Strength Check, DC ?: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (8) + 1 = 9
The dog can't get any closer, and it's just going to keep making Strength checks to break the chain each round, so Initiative order isn't a big deal yet. Pretty sure it'll be dead before then anyways ;)

"Dog in chain be very sad,
Poog cut throat and make him dead!"

The cleric chants this makeshift-prayer to Zarongel as a charges at the dog with his appropriately named Dogslicer.

Dogslicer + Divine Favor + Charge: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (19) + 4 = 23, Damage: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 1 = 5
Crit Confirm: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (9) + 4 = 13, Damage: 1d4 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 1 = 4

I don't know if Divine Favor is still up, it should be for 1 minute.

Poog springs forward and guts the dog in a single blow!

Combat over! Who's going where?

Reta laughs at the dead dog.

"There is door! Should Poog burn door?"

open door, dummy says Reta.

"NO! Stupid Poog! What if fireworks behind door? Then Vorka have last laugh at us!" Chuffy shoves the cleric out of the way and looks for traps.

Perception check: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (2) + 5 = 7

Chuffy finds no evidence of traps left by Vorka, and the door opens easily enough. The air in this cabin is thick and close, stinking of swamp and sweat, with a thick, glistening layer of mud on the floor and swaths of oily fungus clinging to the walls. Even more dangling decorations of goblin bone and animal-part fetishes hang from the ceiling on lengths of sinew here, and what appears to be a nest made of rags, sticks, mud, and castoff bits of clothing lies against the westernmost wall. But scattered amid the filth and clutter are several exotic-looking man-made objects—including a tantalizing red chest.

This look like nice house. Reta Bigbad might like to use as summer vacation place. she says