CoreWars 2074 (Inactive)
Game Master loimprevisto

Voting is closed for this round, results coming out soon.

Final Vote:

Wowbagger 2 (harr.e.hunter, tinker.dll)

Tinker.dll 1 (wowbagger)
Eldon Gorski 1 (uriel phoenix)
Uriel Phoenix 1(eldon gorski)
Eldon Gorski 2 (answerer, IEFBR14)

As the final decrypted file takes shape Wowbagger and Eldon exchange glances- both understandably reluctant to load such a resource-intensive program. For a moment Eldon's buff bar fluctuates wildly and a strange icon appears denoting Hacked!: -20% to Will saves and under control of owning player for 1 turn With a puzzled look on his face Eldon reaches out and and pulls the file into his memory matrix. "Wait, what?! That's such cheese! Somebody needs to get nerfed!" The large program twitches a few times, then starts to melt and derezz.

"Never liked this game anyway... too many exploits and TKers..." With a final burst of static Eldon is gone, reduced to nothing but a pile of digital artifacts. In his place is a portal, a link to another area of mainframe city. The programs present look to each other to see who will be the first one through, only to notice harr.e.hunter frozen in place with his gun halfway drawn. It looks like the detective has met an untimely end at the hands of a virus.

Eldon Gorski Has Been Defeated! +200 XP!

tinker.dll stares at the frozen program. "harr.e!!" The fairy icon gasps and is suddenly wearing full plate armor as she looks around in all directions.

"Run, everybody! There's a virus in these fractal trees! Do not 'Like' the 'Check-In'!!"

Without waiting for anyone, tinker.dll zips through the portal left behind by Eldon. Apparently she's the first program to seek safety in the new (hopefully) untainted section of the Master Control Program.

"Now we have two deletions," says Meowselsworth, not sounding at all pleased. She hops through the portal, lacking her usual rainbow animation following her movements.

The portal leads to the top of the tallest building in mainframe city, overlooking all six sectors. The Master Control Program explains the next task once everyone comes through. "The next challenge is to improve upon the city's routing protocols, which I have personally developed and maintained. From here you can see the traffic flowing through every part of the city; you will all be given permissions to modify paths and advertise routes as you see fit. The program who's changes cause the greatest decrease in efficiency (or smallest increase, he mutters under his breath) will be eliminated from the competition."

For this round, you are put in charge of traffic management for all the information flowing through the memory core. You can work together to make traffic flow smoothly, or try to introduce routing loops and false routes that will interfere with traffic from other programs. The voting process will represent how this takes place, with the program receiving the most votes being unable to direct traffic in an efficient manner due to either insufficient cooperation or other programs actively subverting its efforts.

Round 2 begins now and will continue until 2000GMT on Monday, August 6th.

The little boy swirls into the form of the red-dressed dame whose name was probably spelled T-R-O-U-B-L-E.

"Ah, harr.e," she sobs, "I can't believe they done ya like this. Ya may have been a little rough on the dames, but ya had a heart of gold. They shouldn't oughta done this." She gives the frozen detective a peck on the cheek, leaving a red lipstick print, and follows through the portal, teetering drunkenly on high heels and drying her eyes with the lace hanky.

The tiny green goblin sprints through the portal, cup of coffee splashing everywhere.

"trafficistooslowalwaysslowmustspeedup"

Rushing to the edge of the building, it dumps a cup over the side, splattering the cars far below with raindrops of coffee.

The Answerer regards the passing of harr.e.hunter with even less attention than applied to Eldon, simply making his way through the portal whilst grumbling something about their demise being useful for their purposes. It is not until the MCP assigns them their new task that the Answerer speaks again.

"Hmph, a task even less significant than the last. Clearly, this is but a question of whose functions would be least useful in this given situation. I believe that qualifies as an implied question, so I will process the Answer myself."

Once more, thousands of inky black letters and numbers and mathematical symbols appear on its paper body as it processes its inquiry. As it does so, it watches the Java App, giving its implied approximation of a frown when it spills coffee.

"I hardly see that as being effective, program designate 'Java App.'"

Wowbagger enters the portal. His solution is to allow the cars to communicate with each other. Unfortunately his programming is antiquated and he provides a 3000 baud modem for each car. Obviously this is not enough bandwidth to process complex traffic patterns, but it does keep the drivers distracted with commercials and weather updates as well as allow them to download a simplified traffic map to avoid congestion.

Wowbagger moves to Uriel Phoenix.

"Out of the Ashes of a healthy program a virus was born. It is all so clear now."

Vote for Uriel Phoenix

"Traffic and Death!

Vote for Uriel Phoenix

Uriel shakes his head; "That is an interesting interpretation. In actuality it is an upgrade. Java & tinker will not all about this - not a obsolete programme like yourself! I get upgraded and improved as the processes of the MCP cycle."

He looks at the older programme; "Whilst I would believe you could only run Pong or Paperboy - classics however.... an emulator programme filled with viruses I would assume you to be."

Vote Wowbagger

"My eight bit processor is immune to hacking. It's antiquity is its best defense."

Uriel moves slowly across the grass, he bends down to the Java App and takes a cup of coffee with a thank you. "Really all the best and renowned hackers are from antiquity. How many systems did you crash in a single day?"

With a slight shake of his head; "But you think you are eligible to be part of the new MCP?"

Not flaming anymore, Uriel brushes past the pixie and goes to stroke the cheezeburger consuming cat. "See this cuteness could rule the internet, being mailed all around the world."

"I find your lack of logic disturbing," the Answerer says, turning away from the edge of the rooftop to face Wowbagger. No longer covered with symbols, it had spent the last few moments making several seemingly insignificant adjustments to the layout of the traveling data. Rather irritated, the Answerer's voice is elevated more than usual.

"'It is all so clear now.' What kind of deductive analysis is that? And what honest to good program would put Coca-Cola advertisements on the inside of the windshield? Do you realize how many pileups you could have caused? And 8 bits?! Even my slow clap processor has a superior operating system!"

Vote for Wowbagger

The woman's hair and clothing sparkles and lengthens as he face sprouts a sloppy beard and funky wire glasses. "Peace, crabby dudes," the hippie says placatingly, "The traffic is what matters. Bits gotta be free to go where they need to on their Journey, man! What we need is better public transportation, bigger buses, better data packing. All of you are sellouts, dudes."

"True, sir. " Uriel states as his long fingers work hard upon a holographic keyboard floating before him sparkling as he taps the buttons fast. "We are here to improve the system, to make it better."

Meowselsworth does her part of the traffic routing by using the same heuristics that she used on her poptart delivery routes, and she delivered several thousand of those a day! A digital helmet appears over her otherwise helmetless head as she goes to work on it, running some calculations in the same way that she did in life. At Uriel's petting there is a purr and a nyan offered in return, though she notes on the subject of Wowbagger. "How is this for logic on the subject of Wowbagger, Answerer: This program claims to be special and able to do something that many of us cannot. This program claims to not be a virus. If a program having openly made such claims, then suddenly decides on the guilt of another, and then has the support of another immediately following, then this may imply that Wowbagger the Internet Protocol has investigated his target. Conversely, he may have a special power on top of being a virus role, in which case:

"Well, once again I have a special role, but it is not an infected one. Voting for me will help the infected programs."

Would register true if examined by a Forensics suite, regardless of if it were a virus or not. Either way, this program has made a target of itself. If we see Wowbagger face deletion by virus attack, however, that would prove it were not a virus. If Wowbagger were not a virus, then it would have no motivation to lie about being a special role. If it had no motivation to lie about being a special role, then it probably is a special role. If it has a special ability and openly made this accusation... Well then. I suspect that special ability led it to believe in the guilt of another. We must keep in mind, however, that a program as outdated as Wowbagger the Internet Protocol would not be one hundred percent accurate, so we should tread cautiously. I will wait and work on my routes to hear any counterarguments. I think these cars need more rainbow power."

Caption: NOIZEE CAT HAZ MANY NYANS

"Let me state then for any Forensic's suite out there. I am not a virus." Uriel says plainly. His fingers flick across the keypads, neon lights flash causing him to blink momentarily.

Considering the options and relative probabilities whilst working upon his routes, routines and various sub-routines. "Is your thoughts based upon the fact so soon after, the cycle began Meowselsworth?" he asks the helmet-cat. "It could be that he has chosen to start the accusations due to the limits of his processor speed and accessibility"

"It is also that, there are other roles available. Special roles, that are no an affected one - that He could also have an affected one." Uriel tilts his head.

"Oh. Good then!" says Meowselsworth, purring happily at that. This person gave her pets, after all!

"There is a 25% chance I am wrong."

The tiny green goblin blurs as it sprints straight down the side of the building. On the streets below it quickly builds up drive thru coffee stands at every corner. Then it sprints back up the side of the building to the rooftop, where it's blurring motion stops and it observes it's handiwork below.

"therethatwillspeedthingsup ifeverydrivergetscoffeethey'llallgoquicker"

However, it is with dismay the Java App observes it's great plan simply causes more congestion and backups as everyone waits in line for their coffee.

"stupidslowbaristasdon'tunderstandthewordquick thiswillneverdonoitwon't butcan'tteardowncoffeestandsdon'thavetheheartforit ohandeldonwastheforensicssuitecan'thelpusnow"

Uriel watches the delivery of coffee; "Certainly, little one this will keep then away and full of energy."

"Whilst your comment Wowbagger makes little sense, 25% chance of accuracy? Are you therefore claiming you are a de-bugger/reverse_engineer/back_up. The statement seems to provide honesty whilst at the same time, being full of lies and double-speak." Uriel shakes his head solemnly. As he touches his key pad his fingers darken and crack bursting into flames.

"Ah, it returns once more. Anyway even if you are some role such as that the 25% must have occurred." He observes the crack start to spread.

Answerer acknowledges the Java App with a raised brow of papyrus.

"Eldon Gorski, the forensics suite? This will take some deliberation."

The program goes silent once more, quietly processing this as it continues to adjust the traffic.

"Eldon was the forensics suite," repeats Meowselsworth, eyes turning towards Java App as her digital helmet display runs some numbers, "Oh no no... That would have been useful... The buffs he could have brought us are gone..." To Uriel Phoenix, the feline says, "You are correct, though my thoughts are also based on the Internet Protocol's past claims. I happen to know that with the number of us present, however, that a 25% failure rate is too high to be bloodthirsty with."

"I think my 75% is better than what you are going on. And, given I know the votes for me are 100% wrong given my a priori knowledge, well, I have to wonder about the Answerer too."

The Wowbagger program looks unfazed.

"Well, load my scanning of Uriel Phoenix in your memories. When I turn out to be noninfected and my role is revealed, understand that Uriel Phoenix is a virus and the votes for me are strong indicators of infection."

"Looking through my historical database about a werewolf epidemic I came across an intersting case. A scryer once revealed that he had scryed and seen a person that was a werewolf. The villagers lynched and innocent and the scryer was killed immediately by that werewolf the same night. The next evening the villagers did not listen to him, and the werewolf was allowed to continue killing as they lynched another innocent. I see amazing parallels. Maybe I am destined to be Cassandra, another tragic, historical figure."

"I am not going on any information, I am not a virus. You have not said similar."

"I do not wish you dead, my vote is just a reaction to survive your accusations." Uriel shakes his head. "So, you are infallible? First you accuse tinker.dl, then me now the Answerer. You seem determined that people should all fall very quickly."

The tiny green goblin zips about gathering up CLOSED signs, then zips down the side of the building and starts shutting down it's coffee stands, returning the flow of traffic to it's previously quicker crawl. Sprinting back up the side of the building, Java App appears with a large gas can that it starts filling with cup after cup of coffee.

"maybeifthecoffeegoesinthetankthatwillmakethingsquicker coffeeisfuelandthevehiclesrunonfuel yesyesfuelthevehicleswithcoffeeitissuretowork andnotenoughtimetodoothersjobsforthem musttrustwowbaggertodohisjobandvoteforurielphoenix"

Java App votes for Uriel Phoenix

Tears of fire rolls down his cheeks; he still taps the flickering keypad quickly making sure to do his job efficiently. "So you wish to destroy me, no second scan - if you even have that ability?"

Small blobs of molten lava flow from his face. "This is interesting. The programme bases his tales upon fictional precedent. I only wish that my code is part of the new database, I vote not for the Wowbagger to have him deleted but merely as a defence. Is he a virus, I know not? But I do know that he acts prematurely. And that my deletion will hamper our cause, the cause of wiping out the viruses."

"Programs vote for me with no scans. So yes, a single scan is enough. I know I will not get a second."

"Well your scan is wrong, Wowbagger," the Answerer says matter of factly, "And unlike you, I don't need a scan to know that much - I have known this from the very beginning. Such is my power. Perhaps you are simply misguided by your faulty functionality; with a mere 8 bits of processing power, that can only be expected. Acknowledge that you are at fault and perhaps you will be spared from termination by vote. That is the Answer."

"I am not voting for anyone at present, merely noting the logical conclusions we can draw from statements that were made. I would like more information before I make any votes," says Meowselsoworth to Wowbagger. "And frankly, I think you are more likely a boon than a hamper whether or not you are wrong on this particular occasion, so I would rather people not vote for you. However, Mr. Uriel Phoenix put himself out there not knowing that the forensics suit is gone, which implies that he was likely speaking truth. I cannot in good conscience vote for either one of you."

"Well, Answerer, since you and Uriel Phoenix are friendly and you know he is uninfected from the very beginning, does that mean you are infected?"

*clap, clap, clap*

"Yes Wowbagger, I just brilliantly put myself in a position that blatantly exposes myself as a virus. Surely such a blunder can only work in my favor. I do hope my sarcasm processor is doing me justice, as I don't usually update my tertiary functions. But seeing as you phrased that as a question, I'll give you an Answer."

A single line of code streams off the program's body, forming another orb.

"The Answer to inquiry #4753488, 'Since you and Uriel Phoenix are friendly and you know he is uninfected from the very beginning, does that mean you are infected?' has been processed. No."

*pop*

"There you have it. I know who my allies are, Wowbagger. A virus would not have that luxury."

"My debugging suite revealed UP as infected. Maybe the answerer derezzes with UP. As a revealed debugging suite, this will be my last round.

with the binary role, the viri have a 3 program voting block potentially. So this is the time to stop them.

"For the record, the answerer is not my debugging partner."

"The answerer can only know his allies if he or his ally is infected."

The virus that is part of the binary program does have the luxury of knowing his ally at start.

Uriels tears flow and hit the traffic grid below him; they turn into small people with flags that start moving the traffic - directing it into an efficient pattern. He looks up from where he is typing. "Firstly, do you know our task? We are to programme an efficient traffic management system, otherwise what is the point of this whole task?"

"Currently you are the least efficient programme in this task." Uriel moves a red lorry of data away from an on-coming flow of bikes. "Then there is you asking to be deleted, a classic viral ploy to contact the other viruses."

"The programme that voted for you got deleted harr.e.hunter; although this could be a coincidence. I do not wish another programme gone as much as you wish me to be de-rezzed." Uriels fingers type across the pad, drawing an integral curve and calculating the optimal integral as a flitting packet of data whizzes by his head.

The console before him turns into a rod of pure light. "IEFBR13, Meowselsworth, tinker.dl, anyone else wanna do this manually." He grasps the bar and a light-cycle forms up around him. "You wanna stay up her flapping your virtual gums you can get us through the interface." he says into his microphone.

Driving off the roof he flies into the road of light below.

As the light cycle drives away, the tiny green goblin is revealed, gas can in hand with coffee flowing out.

"thereonevehiclefilled thelightcycleisnowfullofcoffeeandshouldgorealfast"

The tiny green goblin beams a smile at everyone, happy to have contributed.

"nowtoputcoffeeinallthevehicles"

Zipping off the roof, it heads straight down to the traffic snarl below, eager to help every vehicle go quicker.

"You are wrong to use the word 'only.' Such a term is absolute. Assess all of the possibilities, instead of attempting to use my words against me."

Looking to those leaving the rooftop, the Answerer abruptly unfolds into its orginal form, before refolding into an elaborate paper airplane. With the roar of unapparent jet engines, it flies down to the city below, maneuvering above the streets with unnatural precision. As it does so, Answerer continues to make subtle changes, regulating the drivers' caffeine levels so that no mishaps occur.

Uriel smiles in his neon yellow light cycle as he darts amongst the traffic, flicking the vehicle instantly left to force another flow of data packets away from a stationary section.

"Eye's in the sky! And caffeine powered, we should be able to regulate this processor effectively. Hopefully others will join us, come-on Ms Meowselsworth, tinker, Hamish. Rather than having a crash override" he calls over the comm.

Meowselsworth's eyes flick over, and the feline's digital helmet asks for permission to synch up with the work that other programs are doing, hopping down off the roof, a rainbow appearing behind her as she joins Uriel in the direct approach. "I'm usually better at running numbers than just running, but I think I can multitask!"

"Cool, I am sure you're cat like reflexes will be a help." he says as he bursts into flames inside the bike. A flaming comet hurtling through the streets; "So you know you're user? Or your programmer? I heard they exist and when you're deleted you meet them."

"I'm my own programmer and user in a sense. It's a long story," replies Meowselsworth, zipping through, "I just hope there is a backup somewhere if I get deleted here, this is supposed to be my afterlife after all!" She pauses at one of Java App's coffee stands to get more caffeine to help her keep up to speed.

"Then we'd better make it fun!" he zips in next to the cat and sees if she can out drag him.

The Master Control Program glowers down at the programs as they run amok in his traffic grid...

Current votes:
Uriel Phoenix 3 (wowbagger, hamish cunningham, Java app)
Wowbagger 2 (answerer, uriel phoenix)

Four and a half hours left for voting and roll-based PMs...

"Just showing you how it's done." Uriel calls up to the MCP cheekily as his speeds around the grid.

"Come on fellows, Ain't anyone gonna change their votes?" he hurtles at break-neck speeds a fiery comet getting slightly over-confident....or reckless.

tinker.dll flies off the top of the building. She stops at a car and advises the data packet to permit her to link them to several small apps and files which plan better protocol routing, provide proximity to hubs or even outside ports. Each time one of the small data packets in the traffic authorize the access, a new tinker.dll suddenly icons into existence and approaches the next car. Soon there are many, many cars with a little tinker.dll sitting on them allowing information to stream to and from them to assist with providing information.

Overall though, it becomes obvious not everyone benefits from this. While most are able to effectively use the new apps and information to assist with their traffic maneuvers, some data packets seem to become overloaded with the need for more, and actually cause some slow down themselves. tinker.dll does not discriminate over what information is delivered. Advertising, spam, and even intentional misinformation regarding traffic patterns (perpetrated by some programs bent on pranking their friends) all are allowed if the receiving data packets do not set their settings properly or forget to disallow access to unused or forgotten apps which continue to build their marketing information based on the data packets outbound selections.

tinker.dll's solution to link the data packets is good and helps to alleviate some of the bulk of the jams created by Java App, but seem almost to exacerbate the advertising displays introduced by Wowbagger tIP as they are able to proliferate amongst the packets. Ultimately, the plan is great, but could lead to the need for a different solution to the new problem of "over-linking".

One of the tinker.dll's returns to the roof where the programs have gathered. She gasps when she hears the accusations against Uriel, but then frowns as the reasoning for voting against him is brought forward.

The fairy flits closer to the Java App, wings shedding colored pixels as usual.

"I do not understand how you can be so sure that Eldon was the Forensics Suite. He never asked for permission to scan anyone's Friendspace or Birdsong account, so I have no proof of this. But even if you are sure, I do not know why you would announce this but then back another, who by your own admission, cannot be a Forensics Suite and have the power of scanning. This is very suspicious to me. I am beginning to the think the Java App's User Terms and Agreement has some hidden permissions. And I would know about those." tinker.dll smiles and winks. "Until I get more information, or someone is willing to try and convince this fairy otherwise, I am going to have to continue voting for Wowbagger. He wanted to play games that end the world, and now accuses someone while claiming to be 'special'. We're all special! Or else the Master Control Program wouldn't have chosen us for this." She waves an admonitory finger at the Internet Protocol.

tinker.dll votes for Wowbagger.